Protect your kiwis this summer

This picture should not make you uncomfortable. It should not feel painfully awkward to look at a pair of kiwis with their soft, thin skins roughly grated off, the fine hairs ripped away and their flesh exposed and raw. This should not bother you at all.

But let’s be honest, it does bother you. If we were betting folk, we’d put money that just the sight of the beginnings of a summer fruit salad made you physically squirm just a bit. And we know why too.

It’s because you can relate. That picture so perfectly represents the uncomfortable summer-time scene that is replayed all too often in your pants; chafed, rubbed, raw kiwis being cradled awkwardly by fingers of damp fabric.

Summertime is easily the manliest season. Until now we’ve all simply accepted that if we want to enjoy all the glories of summer, we must deal with all the unpleasantness that happens down under. We know that for every ice cold beer we nurse, we’ll have a healthy bit of crotch stank to scrub away later. We look forward to swimming in crystal blue pools but we’ll haul around butt-dwelling pools of sweat in our drawers while on dry land. What is more satisfying than cooking slabs of raw meat with FIRE? Honestly, not much. Unfortunately great cuts of steaks are not the only man meats that will be on fire through the sweltering summer months. There is even an entire holiday dedicated to blowing stuff up. (There isn’t really a related reference to our junk on this one. We just think it’s awesome celebrating freedom & family with explosives.)

To date you’ve probably just accepted this as a part of manhood. You already know that going commando is nothing more than a midsummer night’s dream. Remember the kiwis? Yeah. All of that. Chafing becomes an extreme endurance sport and you might as well glue at least one of the boys to your thigh now. Boxers wad up and hold your man sweat like a sponge while boxer briefs and briefs are no better than donning a pair of manties for their ability to stay in place, not to mention their knack for squeezing the life out of your jiggly bits.

But there is hope for your loin fruits and that hope is called HappySacs. Our revolution in men’s undergarments fits snugly (and stays there), wicks away moisture and gives you all the freedom that summer promises the rest of your body. HappySac helps prevent abused kiwis by keeping your important parts dry and thoroughly separated from your thigh thus preventing the chafe. Installation is simple. Plus it sounds so much cooler to have to install your nether-wear. For more information or to order yours today, click here.

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